The Mummy

I only gamble with my life, never my money.

A review by Mike Shea   Movie Rating: ( * * · · · )    DVD Rating: ( * * * * * )

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The Mummy is a bad movie. This probably isn't much of a surprise to most of you but be prepared for my next statement. The Mummy is better than Raiders of the Lost Arc. Ok, hopefully your wife slapped you awake or your dog was starting to lick places best left along so you're back and reading. Watching this movie made me hate Spielberg even more than before. The Mummy is better than Raiders because I can actually watch the Mummy but Raiders is just a 15 year old memory right next to finding my Dad's secret stash of porno. It Spielberg cared about his movie, he'd be working his ass off to get it on the shelf in a collectors DVD instead of trying to think up some new way to make me feel the whole weight of human misery and guilt on my shoulders. But I digress. Even though we have no good adventure movies to watch since Steve holds his own works hostage, the Mummy is still painfully bad.

The Mummy isn't a danger to society or the film industry like some other movies. It doesn't Back to School. Every aspect of the movie comes out of a cookie cutter. There are no surprises and very little creativity.

One thing I found surprising was the lack of good special effects and terribly hollow sound effects. For a Hollywood blockbuster like this I would have expected a lot of attention paid to the special effects and sound. Both came up well under my expectations.

The DVD of the Mummy was a mild disappointment as well. While it did have a 16x9 enhanced 2.35 to 1 picture, the Dolby Digital 5.1 soundtrack felt flat and lacking in the midrange and bass. There is a Mummy Ultimate Edition that includes a DTS track that I was not able to review. The Ultimate edition also includes a director's commentary and many extra features. If you have to own this movie, and frankly you should be embarrassed to have it on the shelf, than at least get the ultimate edition. The rating of five stars for the DVD was for the ultimate edition.

The Mummy is a much needed filler of the old adventure film. While in content it doesn't hold a flame to Raiders of the Lost Arc it beats it in the most important category, availability. There are one or two scenes that aren't too terrible, including a very spooky introduction, but the rest of the movie falls into stereotypical mindless shlock.